Time

Time has really slowed down. It's been a little over six weeks since we said good-bye to sprout. It feels like it's been months. So much has changed over the last couple of months. Life is different.

We have known for a month and a week that Chris has ulcerative colitis. I didn't even know what that was two months ago. I didn't know how much life would change two months ago. Chris has had a lot of low points over the last few weeks, but he is getting better. I hate that I can't fix this. I've had to learn to be more patient, loving, and to take each day...sometimes hour at a time. We struggle with how to deal with this and how we see things...but it's getting better. The side effects from the medicine are hard. Sometimes Chris is great, other times he's crying, other times he's mad at the world. We are learning how to deal. We can beat this colitis. We have each other and Owen. Family is really all that matters.

I think of my angels a lot. I know they are watching over us.

Being a Mommy...

This is my new favorite picture!! :)

Being a mommy...it's so much more than I ever thought it would be. Some moments are really hard and I wish I had more patience. Some moments are filled with laughter and chasing each other around the house. Some moments are just rocking him to sleep at night...thankful that we survived the day. Some moments I wish I had more time to just play with him. Some moments I don't know how I'm going to survive this tantrum. Some moments I can't believe he's all mine. Being a mommy is the hardest and best thing I'll ever do. He's my world and I love him so much. He teaches me each and every day. I'm better because of this little boy. I'm thankful that I get to spend every day with him. :) I was born to be his mommy.